Reviews and Comments

-Ian Remembers The Peterborough Gig
-P. Vanderhout Remembers Playing at "Big V"
-Review of Alfie's Show (Feb 8, 1991)
-Pete on the Live Shows
-Bryce McBride Remembers the Cafe Crepe Divine Gig
-Jenn Brayton, Official "S" Groupie, Remembers the Alfies' Gig

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Ian Remembers The Peterborough Gig

I fondly remember going with Toby to play a crazy Misc. 'S' gig in Peterborough.

I got to his house early to run through a few songs. I thought we would run through what we were going to play but we didn't. Toby wanted to work on some new ones instead. He warmed up some leftovers and I fixed an old electronic organ that he had scrounged from somewhere. We figured out that I could wire my bass through the organ to create a great fuzz sound. We wanted to bring it to the gig, but his truck was too tired for the journey so we were driving a borrowed Toyota - there just wasn't enough room.

As it turned out the Toyota wasn't much better for highway driving than his truck. A bungee cord attached to the stick shift had to be rigged to the passenger side window winder to keep the car in 5th gear. The car shook during left turns. At least the cassette player worked. I knew why some musicians die in car accidents. The only tapes in the car were of Sarah McLachlan or similar. I had a copy of 'File Under' so we listened and sang along to that. Toby told me that he didn't have a copy of it, so I left him mine after we got back. Knowing Toby, he probably gave it away to some poor unsuspecting soul.

We talked about his houses and how some landlords treated their tenants. Toby really wanted to be a success at real estate, but we both knew he wasn't. Toby wouldn't give up though. That was Toby.

The venue was dark. Painted black but the small stage was well lit. I remember trying to work out how Keith was going to play the drums (he didn't have any real drums and we couldn't find a suitable chair for him to whack). That didn't seem to matter though. The crowd was great and the place jumped during the whole concert. We played at least 3 encores and everyone wanted more. I looked at Toby and asked him what else we could play. He said we had played everything and it was true!

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P. Vanderhout Remembers Playing at "Big V"

I had never heard of "Big Venturi", or "Big V" as it was affectionately known. I think Alan Wright had pulled some strings and managed to get us onto the bill for this annual concert event. He was part of the 14th Wray at that point and they were scheduled to play later in the evening. As a bizarre gesture of thanks, we asked him to play drums for us that night. I think Ian, Bryce and Toby were there as well. The posters gave rather vague directions to the concert site near Enterprise, Ontario.

As I had grown up around Kingston, I knew that the Tamworth/Enterprise area was not exactly urban. Remembering a health food store in Tamworth that served yogourt-covered almonds in my youth, I envisioned a "back to the land" vibe where kindly farmers sold clover honey and well-read women in flowing dresses sold hand-painted wooden spoons. Perhaps they would hand out brochures about saving the whales, making your own paper, and recycling grocery bags. I pictured blue skies, amber waves of grain, and enough homemade organic granola to last a lifetime.

So I was wrong.

We drove through impenetrable bushes to a spot that no law enforcement agency could hope to stumble upon. Instead of blue skies, shimmering wheat and granola, there were grey skies, stammering acidheads and hash brownies.

Feeling completely alone, we decided that it would be better to play than to immediately leave and risk incurring the wrath of those who were not yet completely stoned. So we started to play, with the unfamiliar sound of a real drumkit behind us. It was a big stage - bigger than any we had played on before. There was a big sound. And the audience seemed to stretch out endlessly beyond the horizon.

While at first it seemed like we were being overpowered by percussion, we soon fell into a kind-of-rhythmic-groove and probably sounded like a half-decent band by the end of the show. As usual, many people in the audience had that "what the ???" look on their faces when they heard the lyrics and saw the stage show, but somehow the darkness and the cumulative effect of ingesting various psychogenic substances warmed the audience to our songs and we left the stage reluctantly after our encore.

I suspect that very few audience members will remember the details of our performance. But I remember thinking on the way home that this could be the start of something big. If we bought a real drumkit, practiced a bit, introduced the concept of rhythm to our songs...who knows what could happen?

Alas, the summer of 1991 marked the beginning of the end and we never got the chance to attain conventional stardom. But nothing can take away the fact that we wowed the crowd at Big V '91. Even if they don't remember it.

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Excerpt from a Review of the Alfies's show from the Queen's Journal, February 8, 1991:

Yep, that guy's definitely dressed like a cardinal. The curate, not the bird, that is. Must be with a band. Enter Alfie's. Avoid waving press pass at knobs. Battle of the Bands. Round One. Some sign says, Misc. "S". Cool.

Sit. Pour beer in glass. So. Drink. Wait. Watch says 9:40. Movement on stage. It's Miscellaneous "S - they're really weird. Won't feel too bad about using the word "eclectic" here because -- for once -- it actually fits. Toby Steel, he's the one wearing the cardinal costume. He plays guitar. The drummer called Keith Roberts doesn't use a drum kit. Neat. He plays a garbage can and drum pad. Another personage, Bill Wood, blows a bottle. Starting to get the idea?

Wait a second. Just found the recipe for creating a Misc. "S". Take six university students with a keen eye for the bizarre and inanity of life. Through them in a small room with some B-movies, comedy albums and comic books. Add some chopped Dali and Warhol. Add a dash of Lenny Bruce. Some Look People, Terminal Sunglasses and Deja Voodoo to taste. Simmer for four years. Serve on stage at Alfie's. Give them some toys to play with. Entertains a large pub.

The songs are short. Quite funny. Musical Minimalism. One chord, sludge-a-billy drums and bass, strange vocals. They play a song called "Killer Bee Picnic". It's to the tune of "Teddy Bear Picnic". Lead vocalist "Sinister" Pete Vamos and Wood sit on floor of Alfie's with a picnic basket and blanket. They get attacked by killer bees. They play "Christmas for Godzilla". Wood steers a remote-control, inflatable Godzilla doll across the floor of Alfie's. Do they write songs for their toys or do they find toys to fit the songs? During "My Vacuum's Possessed", Wood plays with a vacuum cleaner while Vamos brings a life-sized puppet, "Ed the Owl", on stage to help him sing. Whoa .....

Final song also cool. "Zellers". Wood encourages audience to sing along by holding up cue cards. Has difficulty.

Show's over. Motion Vamos over. Bears slight resemblance to various biblical characters. Tells me they have three independent albums of original music out. I ask him to describe Misc. "S". He doesn't know. I suggest post-modernistic art-rock. Says he doesn't understand what that means, but tells me that he like the sound of it. Cool. Tells me the other members of the band are Ian Norton on bass and "Magic Fingers" Vanderhout on keys.

Ponder. Mumble. Figure that Misc. "S" proves that there's a fine line between clever and stupid. A line they walk -- precariously at times. Realize there's a market for it somewhere. Their show is hallucination without the 'cid. Expect to hear them on Brave New Waves at two in the morning someday. Hope I will.

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Pete on the Live Shows

I hate singing.

The first time I was asked to actually sing for Misc 'S' was the second recording session when I was handed a sheet of paper with some lyrics scribbled on it. Toby wrote them, I think. They hadn't even worked out a tune when the tape started rolling, I had to guess. Thats how it started. After that it got worse.

"We've got a show.", said Bryce. Oh shit. I looked at him, stunned. He didn't really understand that our music is not something you did in public. You did it at two in the morning in a darkened basement. Fortunately I was busy and couldn't be there. [This was the Cafe Crepe Divine show - KSR]. When I saw the video that had been taken and saw that the last people there were deaf (even our friends left before the end), I figured Bryce now understood but I was wrong.

When the second show was arranged it took us all afternoon to figure out what the words of our songs were. As unofficial archivist I still had the scraps of napkins, foolsscap and beer mats on which were written our little songs. That was how I got the position of lead singer. "Join Us Won't You" is the alpha and omega of the live shows we did. The show recorded at Alfies was the most fun-filled, prop-filled, visual extravaganza we could afford to do.

My own feelings on that particular show were, firstly, I didn't have an instrument to hide behind like the other guys. Secondly, Toby tended to start songs such that they were totally unrecognisable leaving me to guess at them, which I got quite good at. Thirdly, here we were in front of a drunk and potentially hostile audience and I needed an escape route, just in case things got ugly. You couldn't have imagined my surprise when they actually cheered, we even got an encore. Alcohol does affect your ability to judge.

Misc 'S' never should have happened but it did, never should have been live but it was, never should have seen the light of day again but... it HAS!

"Man, it just doesn't get any better than this." - The Beat Is Ripe, 1988, second session.

Peter Vamos, Lead Vocals, 1997

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Bryce McBride remembers the Cafe Crepe Divine gig:

"My memories of the Cafe Crepe Divine gig are vague, but I remember that at first, when Toby first got us the gig, we didn't altogether believe him. Eventually we realized he was serious, which caused no small measure of alarm. Keith by this time had started working in Toronto, and as the show was sometime midweek, he couldn't make it. P. mumbled that he had some "commitment" and begged off. Peter was similarly unavailable. Thankfully, Bill came through, so it looked like we might be able to pull it off.

We practiced a little bit in the afternoon, but we were by no means prepared. When the show started, we did our best, ripping though our easy songs from the set list we had taped to the stage floor. The crowd was quite large, mainly people eating dinner. As we played, though, these people did not stay to drink, and, despite a pretty creditable performance (including a smokin' version of $12.75, if memory serves me correctly) by the end of the night, only the table of our friends (including Al "Dr. Weasle" Wright, who sat in on drums for a spell) and one other table remained. Naturally, we were thankful to these other people and curious to find out if they had enjoyed the music. Bill decided to go over and introduce himself. As he did so, he was met with gestures. At first it didn't really hit us, but after a moment, we realized that our admirers at the other table were profoundly deaf, and were responding using sign language.

We, of course, found this hilarious. From that point on, we prided ourselves on being the band of choice for the hearing impaired. The thing is, this story is so "perfect" that when we tell it to others, we are rarely believed. Let me assure you, though, that it IS true!"

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Jenn Brayton, Official "S" Groupie, Remembers the Alfies' Gig

Well, the official "S" groupie remembers being kinda stoned and drunk that night, I think I was with Tim Bingham-Wallace. I do remember Toby as the Cardinal having a piss at the backstage urinal, which I found to be a very amusing sight - him with his robes hoisted up in from of the white god!

I did dance to (sigh) "Dish from Antigonish" because Pete dedicated it to me - you can hear it on the CD but he didn't say my name - just pointed. In fact, I think that was the only song ANYONE danced to, and there were 3 of us!!! I remember props galore, people behind me laughing and laughing and laughing saying WHAT THE FUCK especially as Pete was running around with Killer Bees :)